Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
Wanna tell me why vodka seeped out of the memory foam when I climbed into my bed?
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
Randomize