I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
Randomize
