I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
Randomize
