it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
One good thing about being really drunk when you go out to dinner is that the leftovers are a surprise. These quesadillas had shrimp in them! Who knew?
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
this is the second day the intern has gotten me coffee. he either wants to bang me or thinks I'm more important than I am.
either way he's in for disappointment
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
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