sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
My costume for the end of the world party was a success. Everyone in the ER thought I was there because I got hit by a car when it was actually from alcohol poisoning.
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
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