I heard we made out
If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
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