Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
I just wanted to check in on you and you replied with a selfie with your Coney Island waiter and the caption "after his shift we're dropping acid together"
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
Randomize
