So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
Randomize
