I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
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