Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
Just saw a 300lb woman fall down. Shes screaming like a beached manatee. Her 120lb boyfriend is trying to push her up. It's like watching an infant try to bench
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
Randomize
