why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
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