I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
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