I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
OPIZZABONMYDICK
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
Randomize
