the family i'm sitting with looks like the Addams family. Except for the daughter...she looks like Shrek
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
Im in a bar and I just invented a scrabble drinking game. People are cheering. It's like the universe has aligned itself.
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
It's not a walk of shame if you run
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
Stumbled out of my bed this morning into the bathroom at 8 am still drunk, obviously. The Mormon on my floor was in the bathroom. I could practically hear her doing hail marys for me.
Randomize
