i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
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