Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
So many bounce houses so little time
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
Randomize
