It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
Randomize
