I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
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