You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
Randomize
