Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
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