yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
I'm drunkenly throwing popcorn at a spider, fuck him. Why does his scary 8 legs get to be happy?
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