I CAN MOONWALK!
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
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