The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
soo according to the calendar on my phone, I'm 5 minutes late to have sex with that guy from work. Apparently we planned this, I even set an alarm.
The fact that I am sitting home writing a resume while you're out inducing vomiting makes me feel like way more of an adult than I'm ready to be.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
Randomize
