I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
Dude you make losing your phone an art. You left it balancing on a two liter bottle in the kitchen. Wtf
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
...then she kept trying to make balloon animals with my flacid penis. I'm never drinking whisky with you again.
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
Randomize
