David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
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