You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
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