you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
I was the only one at the party that didn't get their name taken by the police. I'm convinced that I'm the main character of Ferris Bueller's Drunken Adventures.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
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