Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
All I want is dick and wine.
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
Randomize
