yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
either way he was missing a nipple.
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
Randomize
