I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
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