Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
Randomize