mustard is like jesus in yellow tights
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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