So for his birthday I'm planning on doing what stripper did when she put the matches on her nipples..lights them n makes him blow them out..SEE I AM dating material.
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
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