So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
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