i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
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