At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
Randomize
