so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Randomize
