ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
Randomize
