my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
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