so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
Randomize
