ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
