the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
Randomize