its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
No, you don't understand. If the words "stop," "alcohol poisoning," and "regret" aren't in the same sentence by the end of the night, I will have failed this birthday.
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
Randomize
