question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
I've blown a few things in my day
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
I feel like that needs to be the last time i end a text with "fuck them i love tequila".
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
So much rum. So many feels.
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
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