I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
Randomize
