i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
Fuck you. Fuck this party. I just wanted to be pretty with a cute little tiara and boys sucking my tits, now i have a hangman game drawn on my face and jello shots in my hair.
I wanted to give you a great birthday party. You know I did.
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
