Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
If I could tell my younger self three things it would be: 1. Smoke a lot more weed 2. Have a lot more sex 3. Own a good set of pots and pans
Randomize
