I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
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