3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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