Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
A guy from tinder a while ago who sent me dick pics straight out the gate is a tech on my dad's hospital floor. I was wondering why he looked familiar and why he never took my dads vitals when I was in the room
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
Randomize
